post apocolyptic chess
i went and saw doomsday. i love “post apocalyptic” type movies, and this didn’t let me down. it had the totally original plot of having to send a team into a “no man’s land” to find a guy, get a cure, and get out alive.
there was a virus that got out of control in england, mostly up in scotland, so they walled off scotland and left everyone to die, scotland became this huge “no man’s land” contaminated area that no one could enter or leave. then the virus showed up in london and they found survivors in scotland so they had to send a team into the city to get to the doctor and find a cure. this was just the setup to the action to come.
one thing i learned, in the future it will always be rainy and dark, and all survivors left without government supervision will be muscular, fit punkrockers with mohawks who drive cars and motorcycles with skulls on them. i also learned a bently can drive THROUGH the middle of a bus, causing the bus to explode, yet the bently will have little to no damage and the paint job will remain shiny and scratch free. what an awesome movie. there is even a small surprise “twist” that i didn’t see coming, but i won’t mention it here in case someone wants to see that movie.
surprisingly, there was no chess. apparently, in the year 2032, peopel will stil listen to adam ant and the pet shop boys, but there will be no chess.
i wanna see a post apocalyptic movie about chess. a crazy virus spreads and mutates everyone, people die, chaos ensues, and a chess grandmaster takes over (susan polgar?) and leads people, and establishes a chess city (like elista?) that they all live in, and live by the rules of chess. the “queen” of chess city rules with an iron fist, and someone from “the outside” has to get into the city to find some scientist, who works for the queen, because only he can make the cure.
the team is lead by a bad-ass special forces guy, and they have to take this super nerdy bad ass chessplayer in, and the bad ass chess player has to think all chessically to outwit the city guards and he has to play chess.
and in one scene, they have to fight angry mutated chessmoms who fling poisoned steel darts that are little bishops.
and they drive through a chesshall, where the mutants are playing chess, a the chess boards explode!!!
also there is a fight and they use exploding chessclocks.
yeah, i gotta get in touch with hollywood on this one.
anyone reading this, don’t get any mutating viruses, and have a great weekend.
soapstone said,
April 11, 2008 at 8:21 am
Love the movie references. You relate the movies in a much more entertaining style. In my posts, I try too hard to get the comparisons just right and end up beating it to death.
I was fortunate to see Chess the musical once, a small community production that I thoroughly enjoyed and seemingly lacked for nothing that I would have seen on Broadway. Back during the election rancor between Polgar/Truong and Sloan and the subsequent scrum, I had this idea for a sequel to the Chess musical. Mostly political intrigue involving an election for control of the national federation, obscene websites, and spoofed email address scandals instead of post-apocalypic cyberpunk. The musical could almost write itself from the material at the USCF forums. I stopped visiting because it became just too much.
The backwards chess post reminded me of the cleverly edited Memento. After that, it seemed that everybody did memory loss plots (I can only think of Finding Nemo at the moment).
blunderprone said,
April 11, 2008 at 10:43 am
Adam ant : Goody two-shoes; Don’t drink don’t smoke what do you do? ( My Sister was into the (r)Ant)
On the movie: the soundtrack would have to include Queen ( seeing to how its Suan Pulgar) with We are the champions playing in the final scene with the knock down drag out match. But it should be offset with some CAKE. ( thinking of “sheep go to heaven, Goats go to hell” as the lead in soundtrack following the domino effect of the mutating virus) ..need balance retro versus neo-punk.
BP
kponds said,
April 11, 2008 at 2:19 pm
You are weird.
Also love dystopias and apolocyptica.
Wahrheit said,
April 11, 2008 at 11:22 pm
chessloser, my God, your plot is better than 98% of the movies being produced right now.
BP, yeah more Cake! “Comfort Eagle” has to be relevant somewhere in this movie.
Liquid Egg Product said,
April 12, 2008 at 7:50 pm
The chess queen in the movie would have to be Irina Krush. Not only because of the last name, but remember when she was on the cover of Chess Life clenching the king within her iron fist? That’s a chick that knows how to wield power!
Blue Devil Knight said,
April 12, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Dude you are on a roll.
Edwin said,
April 12, 2008 at 10:07 pm
You should put that creative mind of yours to work and start writing movie scripts. Seriously! Btw, if you love post acopalyptic movies with virusses and shit, you should really see (if you haven’t done so allready) 28 Days Later followed by 28 Weeks Later.
chessloser said,
April 14, 2008 at 7:59 am
soapstone - you incorporate movies and tv shows into your posts all the time with great fluency, i love those posts. memento is one of the greatest movies EVER. i like the idea of the “chess the musical sequel.”
blunderprone - in our movie, we would have CAKE without a doubt. and Queen, but not “we are the champions” cause that’s too obvious. i would use “don’t stop me now” but they used it in “Shaun of the dead” and i can’t top that scene…
kponds - cool, dystopias and apolocyptica are where it’s at….
wahrheit - i was thinking of their version of “i will survive” or “satan is my motor.”
liquid egg product - fuck yeah!!! Irina Krush is totally the way to go on this….
Blue Devil Knight - thanks, but sadly, my roll has come to a dead halt….