um….yeah…..
well, this sucks balls. it really sucks like a hooker vampire with a chest wound vacuuming in a black hole, it’s a super saturated solution of suck. the question is “how much more can this suck?” and the answer is “none more.”
my chess blogging days and my tournament going days are over, at least for quite a while.
i could just gloss over it, but fuck it, i’m drunk. i’m one hamburger away from being david hasslehoff (remember the video taken by his daughter, him on the floor with that burger? good times!) so, here is some drama that is right up there with any vh1 reality show.
see, i’ve been having some personal problems. marriage problems. and it’s all come to the end. at first, we were gonna split amicably, it would have been final in october, when i was gonna get back to the chess blogging and life as usual. but there has been a twist, and instead of mrs chessloser leaving the house, she wants to stay in the house, which means i leave. normally that wouldn’t be too big a deal, but economic times as they are, and nomadic as i am, i think i shall leave the states and go live in south america or maybe africa. somewhere cheap with nice weather so i can live on a beach or something, eat cheap, drink cheap, do cheap drugs, whatever. i’ll be that smelly crazy guy with the beard sitting at the bustop talking to himself. “no, take the rook with the bishop, not the knight!!! push d5 dammit, D5!!!!!!” etc etc
i plan on bringing my travel chess set and a book or two with me, but pretty much, i’ll be a living out of my backpack, wandering the earth like kwai chang caine in kung fu, having random misadventures. so, um, that is that. that’s the plan anyway, i might feel different tomorrow when i wake up on the floor in a puddle of my own sick, the side of my face stuck to the floor (you know, you’ve been there), but for this moment in hazy time, that’s the plan.
no matter what happens, i know i won’t be chess blogging for quite sometime. i have shit to sort out.
anyway, chess has been awesome for me, and chess blogging has opened a new world to me. chess has actually made me a better person. i’ve met some kick ass people, i’ve had some really awesome times, and i want to sincerely thank everyone who has supported me, given me advice, read my stupid ass blog, and just been so way fucking cool.
so, really, everyone reading this, thanks so much for everything. even the people who lurked and read and never ever commented, thanks, i appreciate you all taking time out of your day to see what dumb crap i was thinking.
damn, i think i was really getting the queen’s gambit shit down too. oh well. i have some stickers left, i wanted to give them out at a tournament. i was gonna try to get to the one in ohio, where phorku is, don’t know if i’ll ever make it. (i don’t even know why i mentioned that, it was just on my mind i guess)
thanks everyone.
good bye.
chess it up!
using the force
ok, i’m still kinda on “sabbatical”, but i had this game and i felt like writing and so, here is a post.
check this out. what do dog the bounty hunter, lou diamond phillips, and barack obama have in common?
i live in a small western colorado town, fruita. about 7 miles away is the “big city” of grand junction. no, you haven’t heard of it. UNLESS……
you are a fan of one of the guys listed above. they have been here in the last two weeks. here. middle of nowhere. go figure. we get a bounty hunter, a presidential candidate, and an actor, but we don’t have any chess. i bet that’s gonna change. damn, i should have given obama a HARDCORE PAWNOGRAPHY sticker. oh well…
screw studying and learning openings and tactics and all that. i’m gonna take the jedi path and use the force.
i’ve been abusing the ICC and FICS, just game after losing game, sometimes i even get a winning position before i lose. my rating has gone from 1100 to 1200 to 976. awesome!!!! and i’m even sober when i play.
but, even a blind squirrel gets a nut sometimes. and i occasionally get a win.
today i was fucking around on FICS, where i am “mandalorian” (look it up if you are not geeky or nerdy enough to know what that is).
anyway, i’m black, playing a sicilian. instead of the usual sicilian, the guy plays 2Bc4, so i set up and bust out the d5 thrust (oh how i love to thrust my pawn) and by move 6 i’ve constructed a pawn chain from f7 – c4, indicating i should play on the queen side, where i have all the space.
fuck that, i’m playing on the kingside!!!! it’s like i have this suicide death wish, but i follow along with the plan anyway. his e pawn takes my d pawn, then my e pawn, and i take back with the f pawn , so now i have this one lone pawn on e6 and i’m not castled or anything. but i took with the f pawn cause when i do castle, i get a straight shot at his f pawn with my rook.
this happens, and i am kinda happy. we do some trades and move some things around, the e and f files are wide open, like the vast vapid desert that is my mind.
by move 19 with black to move, here is how it looks:
point and laugh if you’d like. his bishop and rook are stuck, his king is stuck, i’ve got the open files.
now, it’s my move, and i get this idea. i don’t think it through, cause that would be too…um…”how you should play chess”-y and i can’t have that, no sir. i have to make shit up as i go, but it seems right to me, it seems like the thing to do. so i don’t think it through like i’m supposed to, i stare at the board for a few seconds and react.
i used the force. i just went with what felt right, and i scooped up that little h1 pawn like a jawa at a discovered droid graveyard. stomped all over it, hoping he would take with his rook, but no. his rook came to e1 and was giving the finger to my queen, egging her on. i thought about it, and came up with a combination that actually makes me feel like i can almost play chess.
QUEEN SAC!!!! king takes the queen, rook checks the king, who only has one space to move to, enabling my well placed knight to fork king and queen, snagging the queen with a check. i trap him in a mating net like a retarius ensnaring a secutor. i kill him nicely on move 25.
i’m damn happy with the last 5 moves of the game.
here is the game
1. e4 c5 2. Bc4 e6 3. Nf3 d5 4. Bb5+ Bd7 5. Qe2 c4
6. Nc3 Bc5 7. exd5 Ne7 8. dxe6 fxe6 9. Ne5 O-O 10. Nxd7 Bxf2+
11. Kd1 Nxd7 12. Qxe6+ Kh8 13. Bxd7 Rf6 14. Qh3 Bd4 15. Ne4 Rh6
16. Qg4 Ng6 17. Ng5 Qe7 18. Qf5 Rf8 19. Qd5 Rxh2 20. Re1 Qxe1+
21. Kxe1 Rh1+ 22. Ke2 Nf4+ 23. Kf3 Nxd5+ 24. Kg3 Bf2+ 25. Kg4 Rf4#
0-1
ok, back to not blogging for a week or two. i’ll be back in october.
until then, you can watch this!!! get past the first minute, dig the lyrics.
damn, just when it was getting good
due to some personal issues, i’ll be taking a break from blogging (i’ll still be studying and playing on FICS and ICC) for a week or three.
i should hopefully be back by the end of the month.
which is a good thing. you don’t have to waste time reading the crap i write, you can spend that time playing chess.
so rock on and chess it up!!!
